Letters to the bar
by Indecisivly Undecided
Summary: Jace gives a letter to a girl he met at the bar. Before he meets Clary. Yes he's an asshole.
1. Chapter 1

Dear chick I met at the club last night,

I am writing to inform you, that you are good. You are good in bed, which is a memory that will never change. But I don't love you hell I don't even know your name. You need to stop calling me. In fact I didn't even give you my number I gave you my Brother Alec's number because I thought it would be funny. I think he's gay, so don't waste the effort, besides he can't be as good as me. I have a sister though she's pretty hot or so I've been told, she gets around at least. I'll give her your number; I'm not really sure what stuff she's into.

Anyway remember when I said you were good? Well I lied. That is the only reason I no longer wish to see you. Well that and you voice is annoying, pulse you smell down there; you might want to see a doctor. Oh and razors aren't that expensive. Well good luck getting lucky in the future.

Jace the best fuck you've ever had Wayland


	2. Mini skirt

Dear chick in the mini skirt,

Your skirt is too short but I want to bang you. I've wanted to bang you since you sat down and opened those legs. Are they still open because I've got some business to attend to, yes that's right you heard me. Hmmm girl I like that shirt but I have a better place for it.

So you let me bang you finally I can't believe I had to buy you a drink. Who are you trying to fool, you're not that classy. You're sloppy just so you know, it was actually pretty bad, but then again no one's as good as me. Whatever met me there tomorrow I want to bang some more.

-That sexy bold you've been staring at


	3. Creepy Chick

Dear creepy chick,

STOP staring at me it is so creepy, you've been doing it for like an hour, stop. I know I am amazingly hot but please try to control yourself. You aren't even hot not in the slightest. But what the hell get me some more drinks and some porn to watch, while I do you and we'll see. But you have to stop staring at me or the deal's off.

Fuck that was good why do the ugly chicks have to be good in bed? Like really you can't get that much practise. Whatever I'm just going to cancel that fuck date I had with this other girl, her skirt was way too short. I'll do it with you instead but umm… the lights are going off this time.

Jace your golden boy Wayland


	4. Dear sult

Dear girl sultting it up,

I've been watching you be passed around all night babe, in your too tight red top. Wobbling around in your freakishly high heels, finally making it over here. You want, me that much I know already, it's hard not, to don't blame yourself, in fact, I'm a little jealous you get to fuck me. While I'm stuck with sults like you. Well I'm not buying you a drink and you'll thank me tomorrow, you'll want to remember this.

Jace yhea I've been compared to a God so what? Wayland


	5. Blond

Dear blond hair blue eyed beauty,

"My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun; Coral is far more red than her lips' red." But dam girl that's why I need you lets get together tonight…. Are you serious you don't "understand"? The first line is Shakespear… Fuck it lets just do that…Fuck lets just fuck… god how the hell do you function? You are so lucky you're hot.

-Jace are you sure you can read this letter Wayland


	6. Chapter 6

Dear collage sluts,

What are they teaching you at the fancy school coasting you over 6,000 a year, apparently Chem is more important than Bio? Because you, Can. Not. Fuck. Hell I figured Collage sluts could figure it out especially since you were clearly high school whores but apparently not.

Hell I'm happy to help with hazing but I mean really teach them something first... at least rent a porno. Note to self do not fuck that school any more. You even left me hard what kind of a bitch does that?

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck... that's what you should have heard when I came, now if you'll excuse me I have to go whack off because you are incompetent.

-Jace the unhappy guy who still has a hard on Wayland


End file.
